Learn how to overcome rejection in this easy 5 step process
My first experience of rejection was when I was 14 and still at school. My friends and I had applied for a prefect role at school. The role involved a new jumper, a feeling of superiority and as a added bonus a break room just for prefects. I thought it was in the bag and the gut wrenching disappointment when I got the rejection letter was unreal. Whilst that was my first foray into rejection it was not the last. Whether it’s love, work or friendships we will all experience rejection throughout our lives. It is how we deal with the rejection and overcome it that will make us stronger and more determined to succeed the next time opportunity strikes. Here’s some of my top tips on how to overcome rejection.
Why do we fear rejection so much?
When we’re rejected for an opportunity we’ve set our hearts upon it can devastating when we’re not successful. It can leave you thinking achieving your dreams is impossible.
What steps can you take to overcome rejection?
People deal with rejection differently and whilst your friend may overcome it quickly you might take a little bit longer. Overcoming rejection can be a gradual process so whatever you do don’t give up on your dreams.
Step 1 – are you assuming you’ll get rejected?
If you’ve been rejected for a number of things in a row – several jobs you really wanted or your dates just aren’t working out you may feel like throwing in the towel and giving up. By starting to assume every opportunity available to you will result in a knock back you won’t show your best qualities which will result in further rejection. Over time this can lead to a never ending circle of rejection and assuming this is all your life will ever be. You need to approach each opportunity with a open mind, try your best and success will come.
Step 2 – are you focusing on what you really want?
If you start going on dates or applying for a new job hoping you won’t be rejected you’re going in with the wrong mindset. If you think positively – I will be successful in applying for the manager role or this relationship will go a long way – it will result in you feeling happier and being more successful in the long run.
Step 3 – When did you start to fear rejection?
What was it that made you fear rejection in the first place? In my instance it was being isolated from my friends when I was unsuccessful in applying to be a prefect. Did being rejected for a job leave you financially hard up or did a friendship fall out leave you feeling sad and down? Write down what happened and why it will be different the next time you’re in a similar situation.
Step 4 – imagine the success you’ll achieve
One of the easiest ways to overcome rejection and achieve success is to use your imagination. Imagine that you’re going to the interview for that job you really want, that you will show you’re the perfect candidate and you get the job. Use the same creative approach towards each opportunity and imagine yourself succeeding. This will help to change your thoughts about rejection and how you handle it.
Step 5 – rejection is not the be all and end all
So you’ve just been dumped and it feels like the end of the world. Whilst you feel terrible now and imagine that you’re going to end up 60, alone with 10 cats, the truth is the opposite. Over time your heart will heal, you’ll find someone new and realise the guy who dumped you was wrong for so many reasons. See rejection as a opportunity that was not the right fit for you. It’s not the end of the world and you will get over this rejection. So if you’re reading this and you’ve just been rejected, remember there’s always tomorrow.
On a final note it’s important to remember everyone has been rejected at some point in their life. You can be the most successful actor or singer and still have a string of rejections behind you. How you handle it is what’s important, don’t let rejection define you and you’ll learn to overcome it. If you’re looking for inspiration just look at JK Rowling who was rejected 12 times before someone agreed to publish Harry Potter!